On Sunday morning, I woke up to Hunter’s smiling face in the
doorway saying, “Happy Mother’s Day.” It made me smile. Soon, I was surprised
with Starbucks coffee, muffins, hugs from my boys and sweet cards and treasured
homemade gifts. You know, those sweet
gifts that are like gold to the melting hearts of moms everywhere. Grant had
drawn a picture with his handprints inside and had made a picture frame for me.
In the picture frame was a picture of him holding a sign that said, “She cheers
for me at baseball games.” I began to tear up. He hugged me. I’m sure he
thought I was weepy because of the picture frame. Well, that is partially true…
Sometimes I feel so badly for my Granster. He is eight and
Hunter is pretty tough on him. Some days are indescribably hard. I know some
days he feels beaten down. Some days as much as Hunter loves him, he
unknowingly makes him feel unworthy and unloved. As much as I try to explain to
Grant why things are the way they are, some days I know that words are not
enough to console him. Sometimes I feel like nothing I can do will ever be enough.
I can’t make many of his days easier. I can only try to
protect him and teach him how to deal with the many hard things that are thrown
his way. I feel many days like I can’t hug him, cuddle
him, or tell him how much I love him quite enough to make up for the hurt he
has inside. Sometimes I feel like nothing I can do will ever be enough.
On this day, Mother’s Day, my little boy taught me a very,
very important lesson. Sometimes in life, it is all about showing up. It is all
about cheering the loudest at the game. It is about sitting at the table as
they struggle through the homework. It is about being there to wipe their tears
when they cry and put band aids on their hurt knees.
This picture frame meant more to me than he will ever know.
Those tears flowed from a place deep inside that he will probably never
understand. That little plastic picture frame with a picture of him holding a
sign, taught me that I am doing enough.
On the days that I am
struggling and tired and I just can’t take any more, I just have to show up
with all I have left. On those days, when my love is overflowing for both of my
boys so much that it hurts, but my energy is gone, just being their Mom and
loving them is enough.
What an important lesson for all of the Moms (and Dads)
out there to remember. We don’t have to be perfect. We might expect it from
ourselves, but our kids don’t expect it from us. They already love us. We
already love them. That is the most important thing! All that is left is
showing up!!
No comments:
Post a Comment